Are you grieving, or do you know someone who is? Grief is a deeply personal experience and it is an
inevitable part of life that we all encounter at different times. It can be overwhelming, affecting our
emotions, cognition, physical health, spirituality, relationships, and overall well-being. Understanding how
to navigate grief is crucial for healing.
There are two primary types of grief: traditional grief and anticipatory grief. In this post, we’ll explore both
and offer guidance on coping with the emotions that accompany them.
Understanding Grief and Anticipatory Grief
While both forms of grief involve loss, the key difference is timing. Traditional grief begins after a loss
occurs, while anticipatory grief happens beforehand, as we come to terms with an impending loss.
Grief is the emotional, physical, and mental response to losing someone or something significant. It can
follow the death of a loved one, the end of a relationship, or a major life transition. The pain of grief can
feel unbearable, making it challenging to move forward. Anticipatory grief occurs when we begin
mourning before a loss happens—such as when a loved one is diagnosed with a terminal illness. This
form of grief often brings sadness, fear, and anxiety as we prepare for what’s to come. It involves both the
emotional response to the impending loss and the uncertainty of the future. Both types of grief can feel
overwhelming, leading to emotions such as sadness, anger, confusion, and guilt. Anticipatory grief, in
particular, can add a persistent sense of dread. It’s important to acknowledge that these feelings are
normal and that you don’t have to navigate them alone.
Coping with Grief:
Seek Support and Connection
Grief can feel isolating, but you don’t have to face it alone. Reach out to friends, family, or a therapist for
support. Sharing your feelings can bring comfort, even if it doesn’t take the pain away. Grief support
groups—often available through hospitals, hospices, churches, and community centers—can also provide
a safe space to connect with others who understand your experience.
Allow Yourself to Feel
Grief isn’t something to “get over.” Suppressing emotions only delays healing. Give yourself permission to
cry, feel sadness, and honor the love you have for the person or thing you have lost.
Take Care of Your Physical Health
Grief can take a toll on your body. Prioritize self-care by eating well, staying hydrated, exercising, and
getting enough rest. While these habits won’t erase your pain, they help maintain your strength during this difficult time.
Find Comfort in Spirituality
For those who are spiritual or religious, faith can be a source of solace. Connecting with a spiritual leader,
engaging in prayer, or participating in religious rituals can provide structure and comfort. Memorials and
other traditions help honor the memory of a loved one while offering a sense of connection and meaning.
Give Yourself Time
Healing from grief doesn’t follow a set timeline. Be patient with yourself and allow the process to unfold
naturally. Don’t rush yourself or let others pressure you into “moving on.” Grief is a journey that unfolds in
its own time. Remember to show yourself compassion during this process.
Coping with Anticipatory Grief:
Prepare for the Inevitable
While nothing can fully prepare you for a loss, acknowledging it and discussing your emotions can help.
Open conversations with your loved one about their wishes and your feelings can bring a sense of closure
and understanding.
Manage Anxiety and Fear
Anticipating a loss can create intense anxiety. Practicing mindfulness, meditation, and deep breathing can
help ease these feelings. Cognitive-behavioral techniques can also help reframe anxious thoughts and
keep you grounded in the present.
Create Meaningful Memories
Spend quality time with your loved ones, share stories, and make lasting memories. Documenting special
moments through photos, videos, or journaling can help preserve your connection and provide comfort
as you process your grief.
Seek Professional Support
Anticipatory grief can bring complex emotions. A grief counselor or therapist can offer guidance, helping
you navigate your feelings and develop healthy coping strategies.
Navigating the Path of Loss
Grief affects how we relate to the world and those around us. Family and friends may grieve in different
ways—some may withdraw, while others seek constant support. There’s no “right” way to grieve, and
respecting each person’s process is essential.
If grief is causing tension in your relationships, seeking family or couples therapy can help open
communication and create a supportive environment for healing together.
Grieving is a deeply personal journey that cannot be rushed. Whether you’re experiencing traditional or
anticipatory grief, allow yourself space to feel and heal. If you or someone you love is struggling, don’t
hesitate to seek professional help. You don’t have to go through this alone.
With time, love, and support, healing is possible. While you may never completely “move on,” you will
move forward, finding ways to honor your loved one’s memory while continuing to live with purpose and
meaning.
References
Five steps for dealing with anticipatory grief. VNS Health. (n.d.). https://www.vnshealth.org/patient-family-support/health-library/5-steps-anticipatory-grief/
Neimeyer, R.A. (Ed.). (2015). Techniques of Grief Therapy: Assessment and Intervention (1st ed.). Routledge. https://doi-org.ezproxy.lib.ucalgary.ca/10.4324/978131569240
Raab, D. (2020, February 5). What is centering? What is grounding? Psychology Today. https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/blog/the-empowerment-diary/202002/what-is-centering-what-is-grounding
